Time to step up
It's on! We have finally arrived in Switzerland for a looooong winter of skiing. Already having spent 10 days skiing in the Swedish mountains, I dare say that we are even more stoked than usually for the coming season. The fact that snow has been dumping, and we already have enjoyed some days of amazing powder skiing is obviously adding to that excitement.
First week of December I was on a ski instructor training in the beautiful Swedish ski resort Vemdalsskalet and I am going to share some insights from that experience. In addition to being extremely informative, enjoyable and filled with lots of skiing and interesting conversations, it also contributed to opening up a totally new space for me. The space that comes from allowing yourself to ask for help. And from knowing that it is time to step up.
I had a quite mediocre start of the week. In the moment that I had to say goodbye to my family on the Sunday evening, instead of choosing excitement for the coming week, I chose to be mediocre and cry, not out of gratitude but out of some place of exactly that, mediocracy. I chose to make myself small instead of choosing the greatness of me. Monday was okay and then came Tuesday morning. Mechanics lesson. Disaster. I was sitting in the classroom thinking I was an absolute imbecile. Although I was aware of the fact that this was happening while it was happening, I was not willing to let it go. I kind of observed myself letting the feeling of ”I am so darn stupid and this is so difficult and I don’t understand anything” spread in me. The truth is that at the end of the lesson I was about to start crying. When I look at this from where I am right now I go, how can a 38-year old woman like me with all the experience I have got and everything I am almost start crying because of not understanding an hour long mechanics lesson??? However, Tuesday morning this was where I was at. Once the lesson had ended I went to the bathroom and breathed, deeply. Then and there I made the choice that it was time to step up. Time to commit to the task at hand. Time to commit to life. I went back into the room and said to our instructor ”I don’t get this. I am going to ask for help.”.
So what happened next? Our instructor changed the morning schedule to give us some extra hours of mechanics in practice, out on the slopes. Ask and you shall receive, haha it works! And guess what? I was not the only one grateful for that, meaning that my daring to ask for help opened up possibilities not only for me but for several people in the group. In addition to this I also dared asking another person in the group to share his knowledge with me (he obviously had a lot), and this gave me the opportunity to learn more - and him the opportunity to explain it to me as easily and pedagogically as possible. This situation also made me reflect upon the fact that things we learn are ”difficult” very easily become difficult. At some point I know I have bought into the fact that mechanics is difficult and hence, I make it difficult. What would happen if I started making things easy instead of difficult? How much ease and joy could I have in my life then?
I left Vemdalen having made a bunch of new ski friends that I have shared laughter as well as numerous hours on the slopes with. I left as a more conscious skier and as a more conscious being with an expanded willingness to ask for help. I left curious and excited about what this new space will open up from now on and in the future. I left with an awareness of that now is the time to step up and be the greatness of me. What if now is the time for all of us to step up? What change could we contribute to in the world then?
With Joy,
Johanna
PS I nailed the final exam, getting 35 out of 36 points. With hardly any studying, pure knowing :) DS